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i read some dreams recently and it made me reflect on those few fleeting memories i have
had upon waking. a persistent recurring version of my dreams is the constant feeling of
displacement and ostracization.

for example: i am on a cruise ship, it's a class trip (i'm thinking more college-age,
which in of itself is weird, but not unheard of,) and i'm woefully lost. not only do i
not know where to go to get to my room, but i compact that misunderstanding by arriving
late, thus coinciding me to the 'loser' room. yes, that is double impact.

anyway, i spend the rest of the dream racing place to place on said cruise ship, but
always a step behind both geographically and socially. in dream, i internally remark,
'this is a house of unfulfilling mirrors.' i spend an inordinate (dream) time simply
trying to find my luggage.

finally, finding myself a pariah, i nutsack the fuck up and get into an altercation. i
lose, then wake up. there are more particular details (such as my scrambling around a
seemingly complex ship lobby) but it all boils down to a weird paranoia: i'm adrift and
alone.